The Me vs Him Daytime Outing Conundrum

I imagine this is something that most stay-at-home parents battle with to some degree in the early days: the choice between going out for your own sanity and staying in so your baby gets good naps and stays happy. A friend mentioned to me this week that she'd realised she had been overdoing the daytime outings and I was reminded of my own experience - not that it's ever far from the surface as I still don't think we've got the balance quite right. 

In the early days we went for lots of walks, which was awesome when Young Sir would sleep any old where. I also tried to join as many activities as I could, rocking up to our first playgroup with a seven-week-old baby who slept through the whole thing. Guess who that was for? (hint: not him!) We went to baby yoga (well, grown-up yoga you could bring your baby to) and Active Mums, as well as any catch-ups with our antenatal posse, having coffee with my colleagues and anything else I could find during the day.

I had been warned to have days at home in between days out, but I was desperate to get out myself… However, it wasn’t long before Young Sir began to take an interest in his surroundings, which put a stop to the anywhere-sleep I was relying on – and I noticed a correlation between his grumpiest afternoons and our jam-packed days. It wasn’t super dramatic – but I realised that actually, while good to keep doing some things I would stay saner if I didn’t have a super grumpy baby for the last few hours of every afternoon. 

So now my Active Mums class has finished, I stopped going to yoga, and because I’m now able to squeeze in a couple of morning runs (without Young Sir) we don’t do quite as much walking as before. I enjoy catching up with the antenatal group still, and the odd visit to or from friends – and I’m thinking now the boy is old enough to watch and be amused by other children, and reach for the occasional toy, that it might be time to give playgroup another shot. Especially because it is definitely tough at home some days, just me and him. I love that I am able to be at home with him but that doesn't change the reality of the boredom (on the good days when he sleeps well) or the crankiness (when the sleep is not forthcoming and he doesn't want to be put down). 

We also don’t have a discernible daytime routine which makes it tricky to plan around naps but also means we’re somewhat flexible and just roll with the punches.  

Did you have this internal battle, and if so did you hit a groove at some point or does the compromise continue? Were you happy at home or did you feel a bit trapped sometimes?